The Vineyard
Director - James Hong, William Rice
Cast - James Hong, Karen Lorre, Michael Wong, Harry Mok
Country of Origin - USA
Distributor - Vinegar Syndrome
Number of Discs - 2
Reviewed by - Richard Glenn Schmidt
Date- 01/13/2020
A winemaker -I didn’t look this up but I think that they’re called “winos”- Dr. Elson Po (James Hong), has one of the most sought-after wines in the world. Do I even need to mention that he’s up to no good? I think that whenever someone is in the business of producing adult beverages, it’s safe to assume there’s something fishy going on, usually in the form of human trafficking or bootlegging the latest Hollywood films on VHS. Let’s just say that Po is involved in something that involves zombies, a basement full of kidnapped Playboy Playmates, and magic!
A group of sexy Hollywood hopefuls head out to Po’s estate under the pretense of auditioning for a movie he’s producing. But in reality, he and his henchmen need their luscious, supple, alluring, and all-around bodacious bods for nefarious purposes. It’s up to intrepid reporter Jeremy (Michael Wong) and aspiring actress Jezebel (Karen Lorre) to save the day!
There’s no one quite like James Hong. His screen presence and voice are so unique and mesmerizing that it just warms my heart to see him in anything. How in the dang hell I didn’t know that he co-wrote, co-directed, and starred in a horror film in 1989 is beyond me. The Vineyard plays like a tongue-in-cheek parody of a Fu Manchu serial with a supernatural bent but it’s so much weirder than that. Parts of this film feel like the home movies of a Bond villain or David Lo Pan: After Hours, except better.
The Vineyard is wacky, garish, and perilously rooted in late 1980s kitsch. With ridiculous makeup and special effects, a hilarious music score, and zombies that growl like werewolves and re-bury themselves, this movie just crept and crawled its way into my dried up husk of a heart from beginning to end. The pacing sags just a wee bit as the finale approaches but not enough to affect how much I enjoyed the film. The oddball cast of hunky dudes and righteous chicks keeps things moving. And oh yes, there’s kung-fu. By the grace of God, there’s kung-fu in this movie!
Vinegar Syndrome certainly loves this film as well by giving it a stellar release, as is their way. In the extras department, they drop three amazing featurettes on the disc. The first is with James Hong and Harry Mok (actor, co-writer, co-producer) and it is one of the best interviews I’ve seen in years. They’re having fun reminiscing about The Vineyard and it makes for a lively discussion. I wish they’d done an audio commentary for this film but this interview will do just fine. Co-director William Rice gets into some nuts and bolts of filmmaking while talking about the film as well. Cinematographer John Dirlam is also on hand to talk about his part in bringing The Vineyard to life. All three of these featurettes are frickin’ fascinating. Lastly, the disc features the trailer behind the scenes photos.
