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Horny Diver: Tight Shellfish(Impulse/Synapase)

Director - Atshshi Fujiura

Cast - Megumi Kiyosato, Asami Okawa, Kumiko Itou

Country of Origin - Japan

Discs - 1

Distributor - Synapse

Reviewer - Steven Lewis

Date - 10/20/13

Film (2.5/5)

 

Mr. Matsunaga, a cut-throat real estate developer, has homed his sites on a small fishing village with potential dollar signs.  His vision is to turn the quiet village into a money-machine by creating a lucrative tourist attraction.  The only problem is he has to somehow obtain the property contracts from each of the families that own land.  Mr. Matsunaga's solution lies with a young go-getter and native handsome islander named Junpei.  Junpei plans to use sex with the local women persuading them in signing over their land.  All seems to be going to plan for Mr. Matsunaga and Junpei until Junpei's childhood love and the fishing chief's daughter incidentally ruin their true intentions. 

 

Horny Diver:  Tight Shellfish is quite an interesting title to say at least, but for the Nikkatsu Roman Porn Collection, the title bares no surprise and the content surely bares more skin than most Nikkatsu films and lives up to the title's sexual double entendre.  Every single local girl gets down and dirty in more ways than you could imagine.  I'm speaking of not only just intercourse, but blackmail sex, vaginal octopus insertion, and also a vaginal drink concoction being served to young men at the local bar straight from the vagina.  I'm not making this stuff up.  The storyline falls behind the obvious main focal point and that is sex - again, no surprise here with a carnal title like Horny Diver:  Tight Shellfish - but trying to keep up with the plot becomes a massive undertaking (and a massive headache) in order to keep track of who's who, who does what, who's doing who, why they're doing who, and why they're doing what. 

 

The hands down, best part of the film is actress Megumi Kiyosato, who portrays the village fishing chief's daughter. She has a well-endowed chest amongst the stereotyped small-to-medium chested Asian women.  Megumi was a busy actress appearing in 10 Nikkatsu films between 1985 and 1987 with Horny Diver:  Tight Shellfish being one of her first performances before marrying and retiring.  Megumi and costar actress Asami Okawa bring the melodrama of being opposing female leads, yet both women have great sex appeal defined by their own methods of acting as two very separate characters.

 

This isn't director Fujiura's first go around as he had once dove into another diver film entitled Nympho Diver:  G-String Festival.  With that euroduction already on his resume, Fujiura's became a pink film professional and he goes crazy with the softcore scenes that are practically one after the other with perhaps only 2 to 3 minutes of talking between characters to try and develop some kind of plot in between.   With a 70 minute run time, that's a ton of sex.  Various Japanese actresses show off their goods and numerous scenes of, what I believe to be, awkward sex because the Japanese men seem to desperate with their groping and from my experience of watching "groping train" films from other pink series, I shouldn't be surprised.  Sometimes the men are too overzealous and don't make the scenes very sexy.  Still, Megumi's rack does make the film and can get you past the actors' inadequate abilities to act sensual.

 

Audio/Video  (3/5)

 

Impulse Pictures continues to impress with the image quality of a standard definition 16:9 widescreen presentation.  The colors are always vivid with each scene.  My only gripe would be the blurring circles left in to censor out genitalia on both sides of the party (which are traditional in Japanese Pink cinema -ed).  The wet floor bathroom sex scene had this censor nuisance and also had a major edit to skip part of the scene in order to censor the scene even more.  The scene jumps probably 2 to 3 seconds to the next frame.  Annoying.

 

The audio from Impulse is very impressive.  Japanese 2.0 mono is very clear.  Every moan, groan, and juicy penetration sound - thanks to some hilarious foley artistry - will penetrate your virgin ears.  The soundtrack is a bit quirky with an English version of "She'll Be Coming Around the Mountain" playing throughout, but somehow fits the appropriate scenes.

 

Extras (0.5/5)

 

Much like most Impulse Pictures Nikkatsu films, extras certainly bare no presence.  An original theatrical trailer and liner notes from Japanese film scholar Jasper Sharp make up the special features. 

 

Overall

 

Count on this flick to have multiple scenes of bumping and grinding and if that's your thing, Horny Diver:  Tight Shellfish should probably be displayed on your wall-o-DVDs, but if you need something more, something to grab you, something to keep you busting a gut laughing, or something to completely shock and awe you, you won't find it here.  The whole package from Impulse comes off as a bit boring as well with nearly no extras and a DVD cover that won't stimulate any of your senses.  However, if sexploitation is your game, consider Horny Diver:  Tight Shellfish a gem in the rough.